Wednesday, February 15, 2012
first from touchey!
hey! it's been a long time. yeah, too many things have had happened and im leaving you behind. i hope through this i can update you with my life's events as much as i can.
Saturday, January 21, 2012
sibling
Just few minutes ago, I fought with my little brother and I cried. damn! kids can be soooo irritating!!
I love my brother soooooo much that I wouldn't want him to get hurt, be sick and feel unappreciated or some sort. This is why my parents and I try to give him the support and love he deserves. I admit, I sometimes feel so envy of him because my parents is giving him the full attention in everything he do while during my younger days, I only have my lola with me. They (parents) were there but nanay was more of the guardian and parent to me than them. Right at this moment, I feel sad that I have to be so emotional of that fight I've had with my brother. I feel so childish and so bad that I have to shout at him, and cry. I know he's hurt too but he's too stubborn to say sorry or comfort me atleast. Men!! If parenting is as difficult and as extreme as this, I think Id rather not have a kid of my own! but life is better with someone to love and take care of. I hope tomorrow will be better for us. that brother will finally learn to listen and understand my thoughts and disciplinary actions thrown on him. All I want to happen is mold him as a good person with proper attitude and knows when to have fun and when to stop from being stubborn!
I don't know if I should apologize now. I hope he's not mad at me. I hope he won't feel unappreciated, I hope I did the right thing. I love my brother soooooo much.
I love my brother soooooo much that I wouldn't want him to get hurt, be sick and feel unappreciated or some sort. This is why my parents and I try to give him the support and love he deserves. I admit, I sometimes feel so envy of him because my parents is giving him the full attention in everything he do while during my younger days, I only have my lola with me. They (parents) were there but nanay was more of the guardian and parent to me than them. Right at this moment, I feel sad that I have to be so emotional of that fight I've had with my brother. I feel so childish and so bad that I have to shout at him, and cry. I know he's hurt too but he's too stubborn to say sorry or comfort me atleast. Men!! If parenting is as difficult and as extreme as this, I think Id rather not have a kid of my own! but life is better with someone to love and take care of. I hope tomorrow will be better for us. that brother will finally learn to listen and understand my thoughts and disciplinary actions thrown on him. All I want to happen is mold him as a good person with proper attitude and knows when to have fun and when to stop from being stubborn!
I don't know if I should apologize now. I hope he's not mad at me. I hope he won't feel unappreciated, I hope I did the right thing. I love my brother soooooo much.
Thursday, January 19, 2012
crippled
I am seriously tired of all these shits. There should be a way out.
I must find it S O O N!! men! I need a L I F E!!!!!
I must find it S O O N!! men! I need a L I F E!!!!!
Sunday, January 8, 2012
sad.lost.alone
Hurt of how my paternal family has been.
Excited but afraid of what the future holds.
Sad for turning my back on what could have been.
Longing for a clearer path because I don't want to waste the strength and drive.
Dreaming of empty dreams.
I wish things will fall on their right places soon. Selfish I know but these are just what we call "wishful thinking". We never know what's gonna happen later, and tomorrow. I'm tired of crying, feeling all alone, and feeling weak. I know i'm being laughed at because of my "weaknesses" but I know I still have the courage to do better and stand on my own and be happy just the way I want it, just that, I am still not ready to make a move. My heart breaks every time because I miss the good old days with friends and family but i'm already tired of chasing and trying so damn hard. I think it's about time that I think of myself learn to love myself better and care for my immediate family more than the extended ones, so as friends. Oh God, I feel so helpless like a defeated warrior but I know I have to keep up and be stronger. I wished to disappear, to end everything but that's just the biggest way of showing how pathetic I am which I dont want to consider. aaarrrgggghhh.. people, why do you have to be soooo damn insensitive, arrogant, and cruel? be fair, learn to love, and appreciative coz you're hurting so much. ;-(
Excited but afraid of what the future holds.
Sad for turning my back on what could have been.
Longing for a clearer path because I don't want to waste the strength and drive.
Dreaming of empty dreams.
I wish things will fall on their right places soon. Selfish I know but these are just what we call "wishful thinking". We never know what's gonna happen later, and tomorrow. I'm tired of crying, feeling all alone, and feeling weak. I know i'm being laughed at because of my "weaknesses" but I know I still have the courage to do better and stand on my own and be happy just the way I want it, just that, I am still not ready to make a move. My heart breaks every time because I miss the good old days with friends and family but i'm already tired of chasing and trying so damn hard. I think it's about time that I think of myself learn to love myself better and care for my immediate family more than the extended ones, so as friends. Oh God, I feel so helpless like a defeated warrior but I know I have to keep up and be stronger. I wished to disappear, to end everything but that's just the biggest way of showing how pathetic I am which I dont want to consider. aaarrrgggghhh.. people, why do you have to be soooo damn insensitive, arrogant, and cruel? be fair, learn to love, and appreciative coz you're hurting so much. ;-(
Oh hello, 2012! still a drama queen.lol.
“@FreddyAmazin: Any person can be nice to my face, but it takes a real friend/"relative" to be nice behind my back.”
Been having this LSS since last week, it's from The Corrs. Though the lyrics really not applicable to me, I am loving the song because of its melody. It's the kind that I want to play over and over while on a road trip going somewhere far and alone. I guess that kind of fantasy will remain a fantasy unless i'll have the money to buy anything, everything. Listen up and you might just like it as well. Enjoy! :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?gl=PH&feature=share&v=-prcagr07mQ
Been having this LSS since last week, it's from The Corrs. Though the lyrics really not applicable to me, I am loving the song because of its melody. It's the kind that I want to play over and over while on a road trip going somewhere far and alone. I guess that kind of fantasy will remain a fantasy unless i'll have the money to buy anything, everything. Listen up and you might just like it as well. Enjoy! :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?gl=PH&feature=share&v=-prcagr07mQ
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Sunday, December 4, 2011
Things will never be the same
I know too well that we can never put the broken pieces together and recreate a beautiful flower vase. that's just too impossible coz i feel that never liked being with anyone of us. you dont treat us as your family. hatred comes into your mind and heart than love. you never even bothered to say SORRy after what happened. you're selfish and i hate you for being one. i tried but you never appreciated it. sad but goodbye. im/we're better off without your shadow.
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